No, I Don't Want Your Roofiecakes.

04.30 Weekly Drop ✨

Apr 30, 2026

In today’s mix of magic + musings: Upcoming ⚡️ Energy Update + 🪄 a spell to help alchemize. Followed by 🫶 Client Corner, 💁‍♀️ Story Time from me, 🔮 Oracle Insights from the heavens, 💕things I’m loving right now.

⚡️ Week of April 30th Energy Update:

🌝 Full Flower Moon in Scorpio on Fri, May 1

This is going to be one of the most intense full moons of 2026. Scorpio Full Moons reveal what’s been buried under the surface and this is one is all about alchemizing the pain of the past into power in the present.

Whatever you’ve been avoiding is about to show itself.

5️⃣ 5/5 Portal on Tue, May 5 (also Cinco de Mayo)

In numerology, the number 5 represents freedom, versatility, and movement. Giving us permission to break patterns and embrace the unknown. Think of this as an invitation to start a new cycle that’s aligned with the highest and best version of you.

5/5 is the perfect day to set intentions for the future.

🌀 Pluto Stations Retrograde on Wed, May 6

Whenever Pluto retrogrades, deep transformation doesn’t just stop, it turns inward. Making this next season less about talking and more about embodying.

After the 1st, Pluto wants you to integrate everything the Full Moon dragged to light.

💫This is your time to get radically honest with yourself and consciously release what’s no longer serving you. Aim for one small, specific act of honesty rather than a sweeping decision you’ll need to revise later.

🪄 Alchemize the Energy: Hidden Truth + Water Release Ritual

The Scorpio Full Moon is here to help you face your truth and set yourself free from it.

Because Scorpio is a Water sign, begin by cleansing your energy with Moon Water, taking a salt bath, or mopping your space with a few drops of salt water and stating:

“I prepare myself to face my truth with honesty and with courage.”

On a piece of paper draw two lines down the length of your paper, sectioning it off into three columns with the following headers: Truth, Acknowledge, and Release. Now allow yourself to drop into complete honesty, without self-judgment and write down 5 truths in the first column. Here are some questions to help get you started:

When did I act from anger, ego, or fear? Where am I performing instead of feeling? What am I holding onto because letting go feels scarier than staying stuck?

Now acknowledge each truth in the second column and write a release statement in the third.

Ex: I treated someone I care about poorly. I take full responsibility for my actions and understand that I was projecting. I now release my guilt and choose to learn and grow from this.

Take a bowl of clean water and add a few drops off Moon Water (if you have it), then place your right hand (your releasing hand) gently into the water as you start reading what you have written out loud.

As you read each truth, feel it moving out of you, through your hand, into the water. The water is receiving and taking it from you. When finished tear the paper slowly to pieces and dispose of it completely.

Once you have finished reading, gently pick up your paper. Then say aoud:

“I have acknowledged my truth. I release this guilt and this emotional weight. I allow transformation to begin within me.”

Pour the water down the sink or flush it. Your release is done.1

🫶 Client Corner

New favorite story! You may have already heard me talk about this on Tiktok.

Last Friday I had a healing with my Marketing Consultant Nicole. Her sweet Grandmother Mitzi passed away recently and the funeral was scheduled for the following day. During our session I guess I’d told her (I usually don’t remember what’s being said when I’m channeling), “your Grandmother’s going to talk to you though sound or music”.

Well it so happens that at the funeral her Uncle decided to play some old recordings of Mitzi singing. If that wasn’t special enough, one of the songs he played was about following your dreams called Climb Every Mountain, from The Sound of Music!

And if that wasn’t special enough, at some point after the funeral Nicole decided to drive to her Grandmother’s house and saw a beautiful cluster of irises blooming, that she hadn’t noticed before. Why is this significant? Because that’s the name of Nicole’s new, budding business is Iris!

Healing not only removes blocks and dissolves emotional wounds, but it also provides comfort in ways we never expect 🤍

“You've got to trust your instinct. And let go of regret. You got to bet on yourself now, star. ‘Cause that's your best bet” - 311🤍

💁‍♀️ Story Time: The Time I Got Roofied

Back in 2015 I was joining all the leagues I could, because well… I’m an athlete. I was a regular at softball, dodgeball, and kickball. So when my friend’s boyfriend invited me to his Tuesday night skeeball league, I had to say yes. Yes, you read that right, skeeball, the arcade game with the balls and holes. And it was really fun.

Insider tip: to increase your chances of scoring the center points, roll your ball against the side wall of the ramp. You’re welcome.

As a self-proclaimed athlete [hair toss], I of course found myself on the winning team. Our prize for being the best? Free drinks in Wrigleyville!

Our celebration was one of those special nights where the vibe was immaculate. My friends were so happy, floating around like social butterflies, and I remember thinking, what a great night, when I caught the eye of a cute guy at the end of the bar.

He kept motioning for me to come over. This should have been my first red flag. I refused to leave my spot (and chase a man, please), so I motioned back, no you come here. Which he unfortunately did.

We start chatting about God knows what, and pretty quickly he asks for my number, which I happily obliged. At the time I would have given my number to anyone. As opposed to now, when I simply say “no.” accompanied with a charming smile of course. I used to feel like I had to make up some elaborate excuse or invent a fake relationship just to politely decline, but now I just decline.

At some point I must have looked away or left my drink. Knowing me, I suspect I put a napkin over my beverage of choice and asked him to watch it while I went to the bathroom. Which is the literal opposite of what you’re supposed to do. I basically set my attacker up for success. “Hey bud, I’m going to go to the bathroom, could you put a roofie or two in my drink while I’m gone? Thanksss.”

roof·ie | \ ˈrü-fē | noun
1 : a sedative or hypnotic drug (Rohypnol) used illicitly.
2 : any drug or substance used to cause a person to lose consciousness or become incapacitated, especially when administered without the person’s knowledge.

Speaking of roofying someone, I once asked Horace Grant and Bill Wellington how many roofies they thought it would take to put them under, and now it’s our inside joke. Now whenever I see either of them I pretend to sprinkle drugs into my drink, lololol, and they always remember me.

I’m only 5 ft, but decided to crouch down a little for the joke

It wasn’t long after meeting this guy that I started to feel weird. Something was NOT right. I noticed my speech begin to slur. My cognitive function was on the decline, and quick! I was suddenly really drunk, which made no sense because I’d only had two drinks.

I’m no stranger to drugs and I knew I needed to leave pronto. This was back when you could hail a cab, so I told my friends I was going home and booked it out of there before I lost control of my legs. As soon as I got in the cab I could feel myself losing it.

I’ve never blacked out before, but I imagine this is what it must be like. Bits and pieces of my memory started to short circuit. My vision was getting fuzzy and everything was moving in slow motion, including my thoughts. I immediately told the driver, “I think I was roofied!” Then texted the doorman of my building. Or should I say attempted to.

What came through were a string of incomprehensible words and letters. The doorman ended up calling, but I could no longer remember how to form words. Apparently I shoved my phone into the drivers face between moments of consciousness, and together those two angels got me home and into my apartment.

Around 3 AM I woke up in bed, fully clothed to a phone ringing. IT WAS THE GUY. Or should I say, that fucking loser. He was asking if he could come over. He’d been calling me over and over, something like fifteen missed calls. I kept telling him no, and I can still hear him being so incredibly insistent about bringing over pancakes. No, I don’t want your roofiecakes!

Roof·ie·cakes | /ˈro͞ofēˌkāks/ | noun, plural
1. A suspicious breakfast item served with a side of “extreme caution.” These are pancakes offered by someone who has already proven themselves to be a pharmacological menace, leading the recipient to assume the batter is 40% flour and 60% sedative.
2. The ultimate “Trojan Horse” of the brunch world; a short stack that looks like comfort food but feels like a police report.
3. A culinary red flag often served with maple syrup and a lingering sense of impending doom.

I stripped off my clothes and shoes (because I was also still in strappy platforms) then passed back out. The next morning I was hit by a truck. It was the worst hangover of my life and it lasted all day long. Talk about adding insult to injury. Not only are you going to get roofied and potentially raped, but now you’re going to feel like absolute shit for the next twenty-four hours.

It felt like a fever dream and it wasn’t until late in the afternoon the following day that I even recalled that creep calling me in the middle of the night. I immediately blocked him and said a prayer to my guardian angels, then called the doorman to thank him. I’ve had so many instances like this in my life. So many close calls to tragedy, only to be guided home to safety in the final hour.

Also, wtf is wrong with some people. I can’t help but wonder what happened to that guy that he’d rather drug a girl and have his way with a corpse. What kind of messed up childhood does one have to have in order to breed such a monster. This is why I always say, men are women’s biggest predators. Because a woman would never.

If this resonated with you, tap the ❤️ so more people can find this message. And I’m curious to know, has this happened to anyone else? If you’re comfortable, please share in the comments.

🔮 Oracle Insights:

Nothing is running out and nothing is missing. The timing of your life is being magnificently orchestrated, even in the moments it doesn’t look like it. Release the impatience, comparison, and constant scanning for what might be wrong. You are exactly where you need to be, and you are deeply held by something ancient and wise: the land beneath you, the ley lines you can’t see, the sacred places your soul remembers. You are not doing this alone. So when life cracks you open, let it. What’s breaking is breaking on purpose. The cracks are how the light gets in, the alchemy happens, and how you become more of yourself.